still looking..

i got up relatively earlier than usual this morning for a customer service job zoom meeting. in the zoom meeting, he said they have a few different jobs you could pick to work. i checked sales, management, and one other one i can't think of right now.. i think it might've been marketing? then before i had the zoom meeting, some other guy called me telling me about some data entry job. i think the data entry job was a contract job for a few months. i'm pretty sure that i can find out for sure in the email he sent me. i feel like i've said this before but because i'm sure amanda doesn't give a shit what i say- i'll reiterate this- courage kenny did NOT get me hired at sabathani community center.. i got hired from networking at another volunteer job for PHILANDO CASTILE, a BLACK man who was killed by police. he is like my guardian angel. he was a school cook when he was alive- so i'm almost positive a school cook can't be that dangerous. however- i'm sure amanda's redumplikkkan ass has other thoughts. i think about this home i pass every time i go to work at sabathani, i think it may be a few streets down from sabathani which has "STOP KILLING MY NEIGHBORS" on the fence in front of the house. the first time i seen that, i felt like bawling.. tears came to my eyes. it's pretty fuckin sad that officers feel like they can kill black men at the drop of a hat and get away with taking another HUMAN BEING'S LIFE, ESPECIALLY since they're INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY IN A COURT OF LAW. guess it's this thing that amanda seems to be missing which people who actually have RESPECT have- EMPATHY. go take your white people beliefs to a different cousin and you guys can have a good ol honkey cook-out! the courage center didn't help me with SHIT except to help me see how the disabled population get shitty care if they don't have ADVOCACY and how much they get taken advatage of. which kinda makes sense seeing as my grandma was a big supporter of me going to courage kenny but then *GASP* she died! which opened the door for underestimating me to take advantage of me lacking advocacy. i'm NOT going back there even if amanda CLAIMS she'll be my advocacy.. yeah.. you'll be my advocacy alright whenever it's CONVENIENT for YOU. i feel like i've heard that shit before. I USED TO CRY TO MY GRANDMA ALL THE DAMN TIME WHILE I WAS GOING TO COURAGE KENNY BECAUSE IT FELT LIKE I WAS WASTING MY TIME AND LIFE DOING SHIT THAT WAS TOO EASY FOR ME AND NOT PROGRESSING, SO THEY COULD KEEP A MINDLESS CLIENT.. MY GRANDMA FOOLISHLY CLAIMED THAT AFTER SHE DIED- I WOULDN'T HAVE TO GO TO COURAGE KENNY ANYMORE- AMANDA WOULD GET ME LIVING INDEPENDENTLY IN NEW YORK! *ROLLS EYES AND YAWNS* congratulations! you made me realize my grandma was an overconfident crazy old liar! in the back of my mind i hear "so that's where you got it from!".. *sigh* you are so completely selfish, don't even try to make it look like you're "helping" me anymore because you NEVER have helped me actually progress in life. i won't forgive my grandma or you for this shit ever. go pretend to support charity or courtney.. missy's stupid ass needs someone acting like they're setting her bigot ass straight. telling them that i mentioned them on my blog will NOT solve anything either considering i didn't say anything about them that they didn't know. they can insult me for being unemployed again!.. ah wait.. that won't work considering i have a job. oh well. they can insult me for being handicapped since they like to insult shit that a person really can't control. *claps* SEE HOW MUCH SUPPORT AND CARE I RECEIVE FROM MY RELATIVES (ON MY MOM'S MOM'S SIDE)?! no wonder why i've always wanted to get my ass OUT of this state.